two for two

On October 3rd we celebrated our two year anniversary!  Two whole years of marriage and we have learned so much and yet have so much left to learn.  

Because we are in East Texas right now, we were able to go back to Elmwood Gardens where we got married to celebrate.  It was fun strolling through the gardens and reminiscing.  

In honor of two years, I decided to tell about the two main(or most important) things I have learned by being married to James Ryan Hartsfield.

1.  Being honest is hard, but oh so good.  

To know someone's strengths, weaknesses, joys, quirks, and brokenness and let them know yours is an extremely sanctifying process.  

I used to (and still do...) want people to think I am a strong, smart, independent woman.  The one thing I never heard from Ryan when we got married was, "you are such a strong person."  At first I didn't think he admired me the way I thought he should....I'm so dumb.  The truth is that I am not any of those things on my own and he never expected me to be.  He dropped those expectations and helped me to drop them and see myself the way God really sees me.  Yeah, I am needy, over-analytical, dependent,  AND extremely loved and accepted by God.  It was really freeing.  

In no way do I think you have to get married to learn this, but God used Ryan in that way for me.  I long for us all to feel the freedom to drop our masks and pretenses and actually lived with each other like this, it would be AWESOME.  I am pretty sure the kingdom of God will be like that, lets be kingdom bringers now!

2.  Covenants are based on a promise, not a feeling

This past year we moved to Pennsylvania and it was hard. We had been married less than a year and weren't close to family and our group of friends was very small.   There were many days that I did not feel like being there.  There were even days when Ryan and I sat on the couch together and wondered why we felt so lonely and wondered if this was some sign, or horrible point in our marriage.  It was those days that we learned to trust in the covenant that we made, because someone greater made an even stronger, more lasting covenant with us.  God strengthened our trust in him which in turn strengthened our trust in each other.  

Andrew Peterson says it better than I ever could in part of his son "Dancing in the Minefields":

And we're dancing in the minefields
We're sailing in the storms
And it was harder than we dreamed
But I believe that's what the promise is for
That's what the promise is for


So when I lose my way, find me
When I lose loves chains, bind me
At the end of all my faith to the end of all my days
when I forget my name, remind me

'Cause we bear the light of the Son of man
So there's nothing left to fear
So I'll walk with you in the shadow lands
Till the shadows disappear
'Cause He promised not to leave us
And his promises are true
So in the face of this chaos baby,
I can dance with you

I love you Ryan Hartsfield!  Let's continue to dance :)

We tried to recreate.....

 This awesome pic....hmmm ....we failed haha